Friday, October 19, 2012

20 wks - saw baby fester kick

WOAH!!! I thought it was all in my head before, but now I'm sure. Sucks to be you, Christopher Roth Yost. I just saw the baby move. From the outside. Too bad no one's here but Tigger, and he was just mad I woke him up. UGH. Seriously, though: Isn't 20 weeks too early to see a bump bump bump from the outside? I'm not even sure I felt Gabriel this early, much less saw him...

Sunday, October 14, 2012

By now, I think everyone knows...

By now, I think everyone knows that I'm pregnant again.  I'm *almost* halfway through this pregnancy and all seems good.
I've decided this past week that I'm 95% sure that it is, in fact, the baby I've been feeling moving about.  With Gabriel, I remember feeling more like it was butterflies, etc.  This time, it feels more like bubbles popping and/or being flicked from the inside of my belly.  I could be wrong, but I don't remember feeling such "obvious" sensations this early the last time. 
Yesterday, Gabriel and I were reading the weekly babycenter post on Baby's development and when we were done, Gabriel said that he wanted "to read more about Baby Fester" (what we started calling Baby in this last week when I realized it would be almost another month to figure out the sex).  After reading next weeks post AND the following week, Gabriel kept wanting to read more and more and more about Baby Fester (and got upset when I told him we should wait to read more...the posts are about Baby's development this week, so if we get too far ahead, it's confusing).  I'm still not sure he "gets it" that there's actually a baby in the uterus in my tummy, but he is acting more interested.  And yesterday, we DID see him lifting up a friends shirt to try and "feel the baby in there."  Sigh.  Life is so confusing when you're two. 
Which brings me to:
We're having some serious trouble with boy/girl=his/her and are/is distinctions.  I figure when Gabriel and I have a 15 minute discussion about how he's a boy b/c he has a penis (to which he'll argue that he DOES have a penis, but he's a girl), he just doesn't quite "get" that boys also don't have uteruses (what's the plural of that?) and therefore can't have babies.  (I didn't even get into the fact that a three year old, whether boy or girl, can't have a baby.)
It's cute, though.  And it's great to finally have a bit of energy back.  I'm still on meds for nausea, but I'm *almost* back up to my starting weight (woot woot) and it's gotten better to the point that *most* nights (after the meds wear off), I feel pretty decent'ish.  Woot woot?
I'm now at the point in pregnancy where I'm trying to take hold of all obsessive tendencies so I can get as much done as possible b/c I know once Baby Fester is here, I won't get half of this stuff done for months and months.

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

2 year old conversations that rock

I don't remember how it came about, but we were in the bathroom this morning brushing/flossing/washing faces/LO drinking water from the sink out of an Easter egg, etc and this convo happened:
Me: You're such a big boy.
LO: No. I'm not a boy.
Me: I'm pretty sure you are a boy.
LO: No, mommy. I'm not a boy.
Me: Do you have a penis?
LO: Yes. I do have a penis.
Me: That means you're a boy.
LO: No. I have a penis. I'm not a boy.
Me: *sigh*
Numerous minutes later when I thought we were on to something new.
LO: Mommy, I have a penis. I'm a boy. *followed quickly by 'oh look a distraction'* ROAR. That's a lion.
My child is weird. I like it.

Sunday, June 17, 2012

I think we're done (don't read if squeamish)

There was a LOT of controversy over this article:
http://www.time.com/time/covers/0,16641,20120521,00.html
Generally, my opinion is that each parent should do what's best for their children/their family.  I have no problem with moms who choose to formula feed, chose both, or choose to breastfeed.  I figure YOU know what's best for yourself, your child, your family.  Generally, unless your kid is hurting my kid, or unless I feel you're abusing your child, I feel like you should do what you feel is best.  I have no problem helping out/saying what I see when asked, but I see no point in judging other parents for raising their child differently than mine when they're doing what they think is best.
Point being, I've known a great many women who breastfeed, and numerous who choose to breastfeed beyond a year.  What they are NOT thinking is "oh, I'm such a better mom than you are because I'm still BF'ing my kiddo.  I'm so much better than you and so is my kid."  While I know the photo and title was meant to sell issues of the magazine, I REALLY hate that this makes it seem like a) moms who choose extended breastfeeding are freaks and b) think they're better than other moms.
Very few people know, but I was an ext bf'er.  Up until about maybe a month'ish ago.  My experience was as follows:
Before I gave birth, I was hoping to breastfeed for about eighteen months if I could make it that far.  But I viewed BF'ing as a marathon.  Small workable goals to achieve.  (2 weeks, 4 weeks, two months, 3 months, 6 months, 12 months, 18 months, etc; I figured that just focusing on the next small goal and reevaluating when I met each goal; WAY less stressful than trying to focus on 6-18 months when you're three days in and struggling; no matter what, I figured I'd try my best and be proud of whatever I was able to do; I'm not anti formula.)  I went back to work within two weeks of giving birth for several reasons.  We had issues with breastfeeding and I had to pump more than average (once before work, three times during a normal day, and once at night; this is in addition to direct feeding).  I also had to take supplements to keep my supply up.
Anyway, there were lots of things that were  a struggle, but we made it to 12 months.  Gabriel was still very attached to BFing and I still enjoyed that one-on-one time b/c I was working full-time and saw very little of Gabe awake during the workweek.  So we kept going past 12 months.  By the by: I don't know why Americans are so tsk tsk'ing of women who choose to feed their kiddo formula when they're young infants, but all of the sudden things flip-flopped when Gabe was 9 months and people started tsk tsk'ing me that I was "still" breastfeeding (grossed out looks, asking if I was currently trying to wean, wondering when I was going to be done, underhanded comments, etc).  Very odd.  The AAP even suggests breastfeeding for at least 12 months, so I don't know why people seemed to get skeeved out that I was breastfeeding an 11 month old.  Weird. 
By the time Gabe turned about 18 months (yea for reaching my goal), our lives changed drastically...  Hubby got a job and flew across country for job training.  Gabe went into daycare while I was still working full-time (this was his first experience with daycare in any form).  Gabe and I ended up living in three separate places before we even moved to New Location(during which time we lived pretty minimalistic lifestyle b/c most of our stuff was in storage).  And after a few months in daycare, I became a stay at home mom.  So there were a LOT of changes during that time.  You could tell there was an effect on The Little One.  He started waking up at night again (not an issue since we did sleep training at 9 months).  And he started waking up ALOT.  He may or may not have stopped eating for a while there.  It was very slow progress in getting him to eat anything again, much less eating a full meal.  During this time, I was SO grateful that he was still BFing.  He refused to drink anything other than water from a cup, so for a while there the only nutrients he was intaking was a few grapes (or similar) a day and breastmilk.  The only other time he'd gone through an anti-eating phase, it was when he was 14/15 months old, when he refused to intake anything other than berries and breastmilk, which lasted all of a week.  This phase lasted much longer.  Hence, I was grateful (although it did also take a toll).
Once we got settled in New Location, were living with Hubby again, and got into a routine, I figured things would settle down a bit.  They did, but not much.  I started limiting BF'ing b/c I needed some "me space."  It was what was right for me and my family.  I truly believe that.  So we limited BF'ing to sleeptimes (could only BF right after he woke up, right before naptime, and right before bedtime).  After a while of this, I ended up cutting him down more.  If I ever wanted to have a day away, I wanted to make sure he would fall asleep with others for naptime (and b/c I just needed more of a break), so we cut back to morning and night.  These really weren't THAT big of a deal.  There were a few days of confusion when he was learning the new rules, but there weren't any uber tantrums.  At some point after the last cutback, I figured I could maintain up to twice a day for a while longer so we stayed there.  And he started requesting it less and less.  Then he stopped asking for mornings almost ever...and then he started being so tired at night (and it helped that Chris started putting Gabe down more so he was getting more used to not having "nursey" each night).  At some point in the last month, he stopped asking and hasn't since. 
So I guess we're done.  It seems weird, as it's been a blessing, but also my ball and chain for the last 2.5 years.  I'm glad we had that time.  I'm glad I was able to give my kid the nutrients he needed, even if it was a massive struggle sometime.  I'm glad I was able to comfort him during the months he was uber stressed out.  And, honestly, I'm glad we're done.  I enjoy sitting and reading him a book goodnight, or singing him a song goodnight now.  And I'm glad I didn't have to fully force a wean.  I may have led it a bit, but he ended up making up his mind when to fully stop.

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

My Kid Totally Talks Now

For those who didn't know: When Chris went across the country for job training, Gabriel sorta stopped in a lot of ways. He wasn't a fan of eating (anything), he stopped saying new words, he stopped sleeping through the night, etc. Things are getting back to normal now and, even though he was still only saying about 15 words at almost two years, he's now repeating just about everything and has phrases he loves. This post is to try and keep track of/remember some of the cute things he says.
He also now loves the ABC song (although he gets distracted half of the time...or starts singing like Caitlin Millis and mumbles through the letters/words he doesn't remember).
He counts as well...but needs guidance as he likes to skip from two to seven (I think it's his favorite number b/c he'll "count" up to twelve and then start again at seven and go over and over and over and over and over and over and over...you get my point)
  • One minute
  • Pee-tae-toe
  • So sorry
  • Here go [insert whatever item he doesn't want to have to hold anymore]
  • How ah dooning (how are you doing)
  • You okay (half of the time he's very worried about the person he's asking...and half of the time it's because he was just mean and is trying to make sure his mean'ness had an impact)

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

He escaped

Long story short: Last weekend we flew across the country to visit Hubby. We got back on Sunday and I figured Gabe would sleep HARD (as he didn't sleep too well on the trip and I was worn out, so I figured he would be too).
Instead, Gabriel decided to sleep until I came to bed (sometime btw 11 and 12) and then wake up every half hour. Finally, after trying to give him something to drink, give him something to eat, cuddle him, rock him, give him a pacifier, give him a blanket, give him a toy, etc...and nothing worked, I decided he needed to just be sad (aka cry) for a bit and wear himself out. After a little bit, he finally started dying down. YES, I thought. I can finally sleep. (It's approximately 2:30.) And then...THUD. (insert ginormous cry here). Me, being half asleep, is all freaked out because I don't even know my own name, much less why there was a thud and Gabriel is crying. I rush outta bed and find him, yes, on the floor. So I pick him up, make sure he's not broken, and rock him and cuddle him.
Perhaps I should've mentioned it before: I can't sleep when I'm holding my son...or even just touching him...or even when he's anywhere close to me. I had horrid nightmares during pregnancy that I would accidentally suffocate him...and still have said nightmares sometimes, although they're becoming less and less frequent. Other than that, I'm a huge fan of cosleeping and think it makes logical sense. I just can't do it myself...
But after that I couldn't bring myself to put him back in the crib. So he laid in bed with me for the rest of the night, while I kept checking on him to make sure he was still alive (aka didn't get a concussion or have a broken arm I didn't see, etc).

The following day, I was all concerned about how I'd follow this experience up. I know the crib converts, but I think it's missing the toddler bed piece and we only have the pieces to convert it to a double bed (which I'm not gonna do where we're living now). But I don't want to buy a toddler bed and then just have more stuff to store either... So I decide to just put him in his crib again and HOPE he doesn't remember that he escaped the night before. Luckily, he didn't. He remained caged.

The next night (last night), he did the whole crying-every-30-minutes-thing again. So I finally decided to let him soothe himself (after putting blankets down on the floor around his crib in case he did escape). Finally, the crying died down...and (while trying not to move, because he hears me each time I roll over, etc) I peeked out to make sure he was still in his crib and not laying on the floor (and I just missed the loud thud). And sure enough: He's there... But he's not just there. He's standing in his crib, facing me/my bed, with both of his arms flung over the top of the crib, just standing there...STARING at me. CREEPY!!! I don't care if it's my own child. That creeped me out BAD! So I got up and cuddled him some more (in hopes that he wouldn't decided to just stare at me all night long).

It's sorta funny (in a not funny at all type of way) that he wakes up so much at night. When we did sleep training about a year ago, we got him into a GREAT routine where he would wake up 1 or less times a night...and would sleep for about 12 hours straight. Goodness do I miss those days. Now, we're back to the first 9 months of his life, where he'd wake up at least once every three hours. But, and here's the *best* part: He'll sleep straight through (most of the time) until I come to bed...and then will wake up for the last time usually at about 5:00...but then wants to sleep in past the alarm. What? I mean, really? Blerg, says I. Very, very blerg.

Monday, September 19, 2011

Cutest booger ever

Long story short: Gabriel was a crankster this weekend. And when I say crankster, I mean CRANKEEEEEEE. Plus, he decided to head-butt me four times yesterday (although I'm 95% sure that they weren't on purpose, but they still hurt...)
That said, he was also uber clingy this weekend. Normally, I love that, but we're talking he even wanted to sit on my lap (but only if my arms were around him)...when I was urinating. Yeah. I'm not joking. "That doesn't exactly work for me honey" doesn't interpret to an almost 2 yr old's ears...
Plus, this weekend, he was also VERY clingy with Kit Gizmo (nickname Beep Beep). Last night when we were eating dinner, Gabriel started calling for her half-way through the meal...and looking around terrified b/c she wasn't in his direct sight (she was laying on the bed)... He finally stopped eating period just so he could be all done and go to see Beep Beep. This morning, he kept calling for her and going up and petting her. And started calling for her and looking around frantically when we were in the car driving for daycare. I'm glad he loves her and all, but what's up with his uber attachment to her these past few days? It's adorable...and she does so well with him, but it's still so weird.
Me? Birth a weird kid? No way (insert sarcastic tone here). Ba ha ha.